February 5th, 1988
D.D.
You’re probably wondering why I didn’t write anything on my 16th birthday. I’ll tell you why–because so much was going on, I had no time. Although I knew TJ was coming up to visit because I saw it on her calendar last weekend (it was supposed to be a surprise) she shocked me by showing up in school. So despite the fact that I saw “MEG’S PARTY” on her calendar I figured she was the suprise. But I was proven wrong.
Of course, I was dressed to the nines in a Glassboro sweatshirt and semi-scrungy jeans at my own party. (Later, TJ revealed that my wardrobe selection for the evening is what convinced her that I really didn’t expect a party, even though I was joking about getting one.) I was surprised at that point because I really thought I was going to have a party until…well, the details aren’t important.
What is important is being with my friends and having a birthday that felt special. It made me want to be a nicer person because I see how I’ve been acting lately (like a bitch–surprise surprise) and then the people subjected to the bitchiness show up and celebrate my birth. It’s changed my outlook, for now at least. And my dad gave me a tape commemorating my birthday and it made me cry because I realized how much he loves me and how I can’t see through his rantings and ravings and feel it all the time. I need to change. I’m happy, yet sad at the same time. I had a great time last night and really felt close to everyone but now I feel kind of depressed about it all. Probably because I know I’ll go to school tomorrow and it will all be over. But I’m changing my attitude.
M.
