November 7th, 1991
For your reading pleasure, Meg and Katie present…
OUR TOP 10 REASONS WHY 45%* OF WESTHAMPTON HAS AN EATING DISORDER:
*According to the latest Collegian poll
10. To pass the Personal Fitness class that is mandatory for graduation, you must consent to having your body fat measured with a caliper by Personal Fitness Instructor Extroadinaire, Mr. Hammer.
9. Personal Fitness Instructor Extroadinaire Mr. Hammer reads the results of your body fat test out loud in front of the whole class.
8. There’s not enough food on campus to compensate for the calories burned just walking to the Rbins Center (excuse me, THAT DAMN Rbins Center) once a week for the mandatory Personal Fitness class at which your body fat is measured by Personal Fitness Instructor Extroadinaire, Mr. Hammer, and then shared with the entire class.
7. No grilled cheese sandwiches in the E.Bruce on Sundays.
6. There are two buttons for Diet Coke and one button for all other options at the E. Bruce soda dispenser.
5. Beast Lite is 20 cents cheaper than regular Beast.
4. Sorority letters are unreadable when lost within folds of excess flesh.
3. UR has to beat UVA and Wake Forest at SOMETHING other than basketball.
2. It’s ALWAYS swimsuit season according to the half-dozen J. Crew catalogs that arrive daily in every student’s mailbox.
1. The Domino’s delivery dude doesn’t accept the American Express Platinum Card.
